The Canadian Government on the Panda Express of Arrogance and Fiscal Mismanagement

So I drove in this morning listening to the news. The lead story on the “all news” station was the 10:30 am arrival of Er Shun, a five-year-old female, and Da Mao, a four-year-old male Giant Panda’s on loan to Canada from China for the next five years. Apparently the FedEx documentation will be signed for by Prime Minister Stephen Harper as he, along with a gaggle of dignitaries, will be on the tarmac for the arrival of our new guests. This is the same amount of pomp and circumstance rolled out for greeting President Obama and the Queen! Seriously? Is Harper so out of touch with the average Canadian, that he thinks this is a good idea? It’s reported that it will cost $1,000,000 PER YEAR to keep the Panda’s here. FedEx sent them over on a private plane, and they’ll fly in fresh bamboo several times a week.


As wait times in our health care system increase, as the shortage of doctors his a critical level, as children go hungry in Canada, we think spending 5 MILLION on captive animals is a good idea. *sigh*

CBC Story   CTV Story

The Corporate Drama Llama

Work has been crazy. It’s our super busy time of the year while we’re trying to launch all of the product we sold in the fall. Everyone is on edge, and last week there was an ugly blow up. Super Cool Boss (my boss) was away travelling for work and Toxic Coworker (one of the other Managers who was just promoted to Senior the Friday before) came into my office and started causing trouble. Toxic Coworker and I had a blow up last summer and since then I’ve kept my distance. I’m professional, but not “friendly” with her. She lies, throws people under the bus constantly, complains, gossips and is just generally a very negative person to be around. She came in trying to cause drama between Awesome Coworker and I (Awesome Coworker is the other Manager in our group, there are three of us) and I stopped her in her tracks. I said “if you’d like to discuss Awesome Coworker, I’d rather have her here to defend herself”. Needless to say, Toxic Coworker wasn’t impressed. Then she went on to complain that she received a 100 of congratulatory emails on her promotion, but nothing from her two coworkers. Sure, I could have lied, but I’m a pretty honest person these days and I told her, that I wanted to talk to Super Cool Boss about it. That I wanted to understand what she’d done to earn the promotion. Again, she wasn’t happy, leaving my office in tears, then I went to Awesome Coworker’s office to warn her what Toxic Coworker had done. Awesome Coworker marched into Toxic Coworker’s office saying “I don’t have time for this bullsh!t”. Toxic Coworker then bee lined down to HR about how unprofessional and mean we all were.

Seriously, it’s just beyond stupid. Toxic Coworker is mad that Awesome Coworker and I are friends. For example, when she was trying to tell me not to trust Awesome Coworker she said “Awesome Coworker has told me all about you, things I’m sure you don’t want me to know”. I didn’t fall for it; I told her that I’d only discuss Awesome Coworker with her present. Then I told Awesome Coworker (later) what Toxic Coworker had said. She literally screamed “BULLSH!T”. Awesome Coworker knows a lot about the relationship between me and Best Boyfriend Ever and she swore she hadn’t told Toxic Coworker any of that. I believe her, because later, she went into Toxic Coworker’s office and said “What did I tell you about Technomum that she wouldn’t like?” And Toxic Coworker responded with “Oh I meant hypothetically” … WTF???? This cow is such a liar, that’s why I don’t believe a word she says. Needless to say, we all got hauled into HR’s office to discuss things. My conversation with HR was pretty comical … I asked her how she liked policing the “mean girls”. ;-) I chalked it up to another round of Toxic Coworker stupidity and figured it had run its course. I should have known better. Toxic Coworker informed Super Cool Boss that I was questioning his decision to promote Toxic Coworker and was badmouthing him. More lies. On Monday, Super Cool Boss pulled each of us in individually and gave us a talking too. I explained to Super Cool Boss that I wasn’t questioning him, rather I was wondering what Toxic Coworker had done to get promoted so that I could model her behavior and get myself promoted. Super Cool Boss visibly relaxed and said “oh that makes sense”. When he explained all the things that she’d done to earn the promotion, I pointed out they were ALL prior to my employment, so I really appreciated getting a better understanding of it.

All in all, it was Toxic Coworker causing drama and stirring up trouble. This isn’t the first time, and it won’t be the last. It’s why I keep my distance from her. I’m just the latest of a long list of coworkers who don’t like her and have been thrown under the bus by her. Hell she accused another manager Smart Guy Coworker of sexual harassment (which was false) just so she could get the position open for one of her friends. She’s a total shark and one of the worst people I’ve ever worked with. I would hate her, but her home life is miserable, so it’s just more misery in her life. She’s got two daughters that she lives vicariously through. Her husband is an absolute deadbeat who is constantly having affairs. He came on to me the first time I met him. Poor guy, she’s absolutely frigid, so he’s likely lonely. Prior to all the drama last summer, we were friends and we did talk. She doesn’t love him, but feels parents need to be together to raise the children. When her youngest goes to University (in 7 years) she plans on handing him his walking papers and living alone. She’s really a cold person, another reason I don’t like her.

Anyway, the moral of the story is that I didn’t get “caught in any lies” because I was absolutely honest and sincere, unlike Toxic Coworker. Things are calm around here again, but I’m sure another dramatic event will blow soon, and we’ll all be chatting with HR and the boss again. Best part was that Toxic Coworker was caught in multiple lies. Not only the one she told Super Cool Boss about me, but actually lied about what HR said to her. HR and Super Cool Boss were talking and HR would say “I never said that!” … yep, Toxic Coworker is a train wreck, but she’s good at her job and gets things done … so we keep her.

That was my work drama, and everything else is going well.

He talks to me.

That’s likely one of the most unique things (for me) about this relationship. A smart person tries to look at their past, learn from their mistakes. Mistakes are a good thing, we learn more from our mistakes than our successes. It wasn’t the only mistake in my marriage, but communication SUCKED from day one, but there wasn’t a big attempt on either side to fix it.


Now, it’s a key focus of the relationship. We actually SCHEDULE time to “talk” with no distractions once a week. It’s not the only time we talk, or text, or email, or IM … but it’s a sacred time for each of us to ensure we are always open and honest with one another. We call them our meetings and they’re always in our bedroom, by the fireplace in the sitting area. No phones, to tv’s or computers, just us, comfortable seating and talking. It’s AWESOME. It’s always when the boys aren’t there, so that it isn’t interrupted.

This past weekend’s meeting was the best yet. It was structured in such a way, delicate issues were address, and with our open and honest dialogue, we cleared up some outstanding issues and moved forward. It’s amazing, how being able to trust the person you’re talking to, gives you the strength to be honest and lay yourself out there. We talked for 2 hours (it’s typically an hour) and then hopped in the truck and continued the conversation on the drive down to my mother’s place (birthday dinner for my sister).

I NEVER feel as relaxed as when it’s just him and me and we’re talking. I trust that he’ll listen to me. I trust that he wants to make me happy. I trust that my happiness is important to him. I trust that he loves me, for me. I dealt with 15 years of not trusting, and it’s amazing the freedom and power it gives you to trust. There’s no stress with him, only love, happiness and freedom.

One of the BEST sites!

The Purpose Fairy

Whenever I feel like I'm struggling with something, I tend to go to this website for inspiration ... and some days salvation.  The latest post that jumped off the page and smacked me upside the head with the proverbial clue-by-four was:

Letting Go:  5 Limiting Beliefs that block your happiness

1. Life is Fair
Sooooo appropriate right now.  Last week, one of my coworkers was promoted to Senior (job I do).  Was it fair, nope.  She's horrible, constantly complains about people, gripes she has WAY too much to do, then stands around and gossips all the time.  Sure, she's been here for 12 years, but that's the ONLY reason she was promoted, and that's wreaks of union type seniority.  GROSS!  Ok, so it's not fair, but it is what it is, and I've got a THOUSAND amazing things going on in my life, this one is NOT going to bring me down.

2. Suffering is bad.
Ya, divorce isn't fun, for anyone.  But, in a lot of cases, the hurt and pain that goes with it needs to be experienced so you can appreciate how good the aftermath is.  I'm watching some of my friends go through this too.  Funny, a large part of my on line friend community is at varying stages of it, and we're suffering, surviving and getting stronger, together.  So yes, I had to rip the band aid off that festering wound that was my marriage so that I could finally heal and have a healthy relationship, which I'm beyond blessed to have!

3. You are in control.
Ohhhhhhhh this one took me out at the knees yesterday.  The oldest gift put the youngest in my bathtub yesterday (as he was instructed to do and has done before).  Oldest gift is even MORE strict about the amount of water used in the bath (when he's not in it), so youngest gift always whines for more.  When the tone of the whining changed, I went up stairs to find him with my razor in one hand saying "mommy my leg's bleeding".  I just about died.  Screaming for bandages, it really was a minor scratch, but in handing over control, I'd allowed the youngest gift to injure himself, and scare the life out of all of us.  I tortured myself over my "mommy fail" all night, until I asked BBE to come up and hold me while I cried.  In doing so, he and I talked about when we'd injured ourselves as kids.  Hmmmm, neither gift has been hospitalized yet (which I'd been due to self injury by the age of 3), so technically, I'm doing well.  We ended up laughing and I felt a thousand times better, knowing that some things are simply beyond my control, and just to do my best and love them lots!

4.  People are obligated to love you a specific way.
I'm still figuring this one out.  I'm in a fantastic, healthy and strong relationship.  I honestly feel like I can fly.  I don't put expectations on him, but I LOVE that he's so incredibly thoughtful and caring. I'll never tell him he's not loving me right, because he loves me, and that's right!

5.Keeping the peace actually keeps the peace.
Hello to the last 10 years of my marriage.  It came to a point that we said "well apparently only one of us can be happy" ... and for a long time, we traded off time.  It wasn't healthy, I wasn't happy, he wasn't happy ... and instead of fighting to find solutions we both fell silent to keep the peace.  That caused the long, slow, painful death of a marriage.  Now, I'm not saying I mind, because from the ashes rose a love story to span the ages.  Now, if I'm not happy, or if I'm hurt, I'll talk about it.  I won't say "oh it's fine" when it's not.  That helps no one, only loving honesty does.

And THAT my friends, is 5 to grow on :-)

I need to remember ...

As I sit here with two whiny little boys, facing almost 3 weeks without them I need to remember that I'll miss them and I need to cherish this time (ya ya, I'm obviously ignoring them sitting on the computer).  The oldest gift is sitting on top of me, and the youngest has his nose pressed up against the TV.
We have plans today, but they don't start for another hour or so.  We're going shopping, then to the Y to go swimming.  I'm going to squeeze all the fun out of today possible.  Next week they're with their father, then the following week is March Break, and they typically spend time with their Aunt, so I'll only have a couple of days with them, then get them back on the weekend and hand them back over to their father for his week.  I know I'm going to miss them desperately, but as they're UBERwhiney today I need to remember, I AM going to miss them.

*sigh*

As a coffee fan

As a fan, even as an aficionado ... I HIGHLY recommend the new Melitta single cup servings.  They're awesome, robust, flavourful and rich.  Everything you want in a single serving ... I just hope they come out with flavoured versions soon!

http://www.melitta.ca/coffee/single-serve