Right now I'm struggling. Obviously this week didn't start well (per yesterday's post). I'm facing one of my best friends leaving again. Just because it's not the end of the world, doesn't mean it doesn't suck, and it doesn't hurt. But while I'm working on that, an number of other things are bugging me.
Husband ~ I love you, I REALLY do ... but the next time you take a pot shot and call me my father, I may punch you in the face. I get that you're mad at me. I get that I'm pissing you off. I get that I'm not perfect ... but sweetheart ... have a peek in the mirror and perhaps you'll understand some of how I'm feeling. Try participating in our life ... it's not a spectator sport ... or worse yet, something you can get the highlights on at your convenience.
Wine friend ~ I love you too. I understand you've recently made a large and dramatic change in your life. I know the recent diagnoses of your oldest gift is an adjustment. I know that things are different for you now. But you need to speak to me without being a royal flaming bitch ... or I'm just going to stop talking to you. I need to surround myself with positive people who add to my life. I stopped walking on eggshells 4 months ago when the psycho left, I'm not willing to start it again.
To the girl trainer ~ ok honey, I really care for you ... but I'm not "smitten" with you like the others are ... so when you're a spoiled little brat, I just want to tell you to fuck off and grow the fuck up. You're NOT reaching out to people, you're throwing a tantrum ... better than the littlest gift even does. Your threats of "I get bored with people" are fine with me. Don't threaten, grow up and realize that people care for you or be a baby and continue on your sporadic, directionless waste of a life. You can be a beautiful, brilliant, talented, charismatic woman ... but right now ... your not any of those things. Your choice, I'm leaving you be until you grow up.
I'm trying to do a lot right now. I'm trying to get over a cold. I'm trying to get healthy. I'm trying to stay off the cancer sticks. I'm trying to reduce my alcohol intake. I'm trying to rock my job. I'm trying to be a wife, a mom, an employee, a friend ...
No comments:
Post a Comment